General

Disposable culture? Disposable ministry?

An open landfill in an unknown location. Evidence of the disposable consumer culture of the 20th – 21st centuries. Disposable ministry has to go.
What’s with the long hiatus between articles? Simply put, too many other projects! I’m hoping to get back to regular writing here, but in the meantime, posts may be a bit sporadic.

“The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.”

Attributed to Benjamin Franklin
(Similar quote attributed to Henry Royce)

It’s no secret that we leave in the age of Walmart, “fast fashion” and Keurig K-Cups: inexpensive products for instant gratification. Of course, they come with an unspoken social agreement that it’s all going to end up in the landfill anyway, and that heirloom products (e.g.: furniture that didn’t come from IKEA, hand-stitched leather boots, etc.) are reserved for the ultra-rich.

Sadly, that cultural value has continued to thrive as an invisible ministry value in post-pandemic churches… urgency asks us to build fast which excuses us from the burden of having to build well.

In other words, the “needs” in our ministries are presented as so significant that we are encouraged to prioritize function and immediate impact in our work, even if the long-term sustainability is questionable. Without critique, ministry models reflect the culture from which they come.

So maybe we shouldn’t be surprised that eventually the sweetness of our “low price” projects (e.g.: yet another “new and groundbreaking” leadership approach for $9.99 on Kindle; the decision to promote emotionally and spiritually immature volunteers in order to grow a program; an entire conference dedicated to “tips you can use right now!”) are forgotten.

Water pours out of a ceiling light in a newly built home.

Like the anguish felt when water pours out of the ceiling in a newly built home, “the bitterness of low quality remains after the sweetness of low prices [has subsided]” in ministry.

Without critique, ministry models reflect the culture from which they come.

Every post-pandemic ministry leader knows something about this bitterness:

  • It turns out your formerly enthusiastic church members weren’t mature disciples after all.
  • The “rapidly educated” pastors around you are painfully lacking in depth, unable to speak wisely into complex issues.
  • “Innovative and brave” new ministry strategies completed their evaporation into ineffectiveness post-pandemic, turning out to be little more than gimmicks.
  • As ministry gurus and “successful” networks imploded, ordinary leaders are fearfully left to make sense of why.
  • Despite spending millions of dollars collectively on new models and approaches, the church has less penetrating relevance and a more damaged reputation within Western Culture than ever before.

Ultimately, we are where we are because we built quickly instead of well. We accidentally mirrored the “cheap and fast” ethic of the culture instead of the “slow and rich” ethic of Jesus.

How do you know if you’re embracing “cheap and fast”?

So how do we know if we’re doing this? In some ways, we all participate in the “sins of our culture” (Jacques Ellul), but that shouldn’t prevent us from doing an honest self-evaluation:

  1. You’re putting off what’s best because it will take “too long.”
    Urgency distracts, but don’t forget that time is going to pass anyway. While you may look back and realize that if you had committed to “best” instead of “quick” 10 years ago, you’d be in a better place today, you still have a lot of future in front of you! Instead of getting discouraged, get going! Change your thinking.
  2. You’re dismissing “most healthy” in favour of “most fun.”
    Healthy is rarely “fun”… it’s generally an agony as we experience when we start going to the gym or commit to cutting caffeine out of our diets. Truthfully, we all find it much easier to spend $39 a month on a “miracle supplement” than we would addressing the patterns and habits in our lives that brought us into our current crisis. Change your thinking.
  3. You’re focused on image instead of impact.
    Whether it’s fixating on a celebrity pastor or jealously emulating their social media strategy, in today’s “Instagram World” pastors don’t actually need to be successful in their ministry… they just have to look like they are. Image and persona carry a cost of substance (as Neil Postman aptly pointed out); but it’s more immediately gratifying to build a platform than it is to become a person who has something of substance to say. Change your thinking.

So… what can you do about it?

Here are 4 great ideas that launch you hard away from “low price, low quality.”

  1. Start your next (or first) theological degree.
    I know, you’ve been putting it off. The ministry is too urgent and too busy. But the truth is that you’ll be a better practitioner in ten years if you are challenged to think critically and rooted in a deeper understanding of scripture and culture. Here’s the key… it doesn’t need to be a “full time” commitment. Personally, I took a few graduate courses a year for almost a decade while I pastored. And with the availability of quality distance-based learning, you can likely pursue that undergrad or graduate degree without an expensive commute (see the end of this article for a recommendation).
  2. Complete a seasonal “no practical books” challenge.
    Going into the summer, you’ve likely got a list of books you’ve been hoping to read. Try this challenge: prune from the list all of the current books on method and practice and instead dive into brilliant authors who are engaging core ideas instead. I suspect that a summer of Leslie Newbigin, Jacques Ellul, CS Lewis, and St. Athanasius will have a greater impact on your ministry than five “Top Ten best-sellers” from the ministry conference book table. You’re already an expert on your local context… fuel your mind with good content and see what happens.
  3. Prune and Invest.
    How many underfunded and poorly resourced ministries do you oversee? Which one has the best potential to utterly transform your church and community over the next ten years if properly supported? Use these questions to begin an evaluation process that will ultimately result in the cancellation and dismantling of less productive ministries (Hint: Are they doing a great job at discipling believers or reaching lost people? No? Bring on the axe…) so that you can redirect resources to the ones that are. Resist the urge to evaluate using an “immediate success” evaluation matrix. Plan for a 10-year impact and be steady.
  4. Unfollow and Connect.
    Take a break from the “ministry influencers” and “celebrity pastors” that are dominating your social media feeds. Mute or unfollow them (temporarily) to clear your digital space, and instead seek inspiration in-person with a far less famous peer. Find a a rarely celebrated and totally underestimated mentor who has time for slow conversations and is actually interested in knowing you.

We can no longer afford “cheap”.

As we face a national clergy shortage, a universal 25% church attendance decline and innumerable cultural landmines, one thing the church cannot afford is anymore “cheap” solutions. We need rich, qualified, “built to last” approaches birthed in the hearts of disciples with substance… not easy, practical, “turn-key” approaches birthed in a clever marketing department.

Pursuing this method means putting our dreams of “results this season” on hold while we invest in a better future. I hope that future begins with you making that kind of investment into yourself.


Education Recommendations

As you may know, I work full-time as the Director of the Youth Ministry Major in the B.Th program at Master’s College & Seminary (www.mcs.edu). I want to take this opportunity to reach out to pastors (especially youth pastors!) that have not yet completed their undergraduate education. Master’s offers a robust distance learning program and we’d be thrilled to help you complete. Of course, if you live in Eastern Ontario, there are even more opportunities with in-person learning.

If you’d like to begin your undergraduate training with a course in Youth Ministry, I’d be happy to connect in order to help make that happen. Please use the “request information” link here and we’ll be in touch.

Sharpening your preaching to Teenagers

microphone in hand
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

We’ve all had one of those days where we step off the stage highly discouraged and genuinely wonder why God decided we would be a good choice to preach His word to young people.

Those moments of woe can come from anything: a misguided attempt to make the Levitical rituals “interesting”, an illustration that just didn’t play with your group, or hours and hours of prep that just didn’t translate into anything clear (let alone life-changing).

Rather than give you a pep-talk on being kind to yourself after you preach (which you should, by the way), I want to share a few of my best tips for preaching to teenagers; things I learned from the trenches over 20-years with a microphone in my hand.

1. Ditch the three-point sermon.

Please. Hear me. If there’s nothing else you do, do this: Stop preaching 3-point sermons.

On their best days, your audience (yes… I said audience… because teens and adults are just the same here!) is going to remember one point from your message. When you preach 3 points, you’re not just rolling the dice on what they’ll remember, you’re actually increasing the chances that they’ll be overloaded and won’t remember anything.

If there’s nothing else you do, do this:
Stop preaching 3-point sermons.

I’ve heard Pastors say “… but there are three clear principles here that need to be shared.” Well, as Andy Stanley says in Communicating for a Change, “Congratulations – you’ve got a series.” Regardless of what you were raised to believe, human beings aren’t good multi-taskers in dynamic environments. Oh sure, you can read a 3-point essay and hold onto it no problem… but when it comes to live, dynamic communication? That’s a different story. We have one-track minds and we can really only focus on one thing at a time.

If you shift your preaching style and focus on sharing ONE big idea from the text in each message, two things are going to happen:

  1. Your audience impact is going to improve. With only one point, the likelihood that your audience will remember the ONE THING that you’re trying to communicate is going to go through the roof. If they remember what you’ve said, the likelihood they do something about it is also going to improve.
  2. Your sermon prep process is going to become simpler. With only one point to focus on, your brain is going to be more focused; and your messages are going to become richer and more clear.

2. Know your audience.

I’d be a wealthy man if I had $5 for every stereotypical youth sermon that ultimate ends with an application like…

  • “Read your bible…”
  • “So don’t date an unbeliever…”
  • “Stand up for Jesus in your school!”

(And double-points for every time someone invites them to the front to nail some sins to a cross…)

The teens in your community need so much more than these predictable tropes on a youth night. They’re complex persons that are wrestling with ethics, experiencing joys and sorrows, and genuinely in needing to be grounded in the truth of Gods word.

One of the biggest mistakes youth pastors make is preaching one-dimensional sermons from the mistaken belief that their teens aren’t ready for wider content.

One of the biggest mistakes youth pastors make is preaching one-dimensional sermons from the mistaken belief that their teens aren’t ready for wider content.

The solution to this problem isn’t greater complexity (no, you shouldn’t put together a 9-part series on Augustinian Theology for your junior high group…); the solution is listening more.

One of the disciplines I executed faithfully for almost 20-years was the “I have time for you….” coffee meet up. I just wanted to make sure I was available to sit across from a 15-year old and hear about what was “happening” in their lives. Sometimes we talked about faith, sometimes we talked about dreams and future ambitions, and sometimes we talked about really hard things. But taking this time to really know my audience meant that I could preach messages to the whole community that were actually connected to the raw and real realities of their lives.

Rather than get complex, I got simple. I preached sermons that answered questions like…

  • What does it mean to find God’s presence in the midst of loneliness?
  • What does it look like to live faithfully as a disciple of Jesus in the “ordinary-ness” of our lives?
  • How can I “think Christianly” about my mental health?

When you know your community exceptionally well, you’ll avoid the trap of preaching weak sermons based on surface-level assumptions.

When you know your community exceptionally well, you’ll avoid the trap of preaching weak sermons based on surface-level assumptions.

3. Rehearse. Then watch yourself.

I know. You don’t want to. But here’s why you need to:

There’s a HUGE gap between the way you experience your preaching and the way your audience experiences your preaching. And the wider you let that gap become, the less effective you’re going to be.

There’s a HUGE gap between the way you experience your preaching and the way your audience experiences your preaching.

The content of your preaching is really important. But content that’s poorly delivered? Well, it has about as much impact as poor content.

Record yourself and watch. Take notes.

  • Where are you trying to make up for a lack of memorization with flailing hand gestures (always while your eyes read directly from your notes…)?
  • How many times did you say, “And, um –” or “OK…”
  • Was that story you love to tell actually fun to listen to? (Ouch, I know that hurt… sorry)
  • Are you comfortable enough in your content that your spiritual leadership is coming through? Or is it just a full-blast max-bandwidth information dump?

Figure out what it’s like to listen to you preach. And then rehearse your message until your delivery matches the quality of your content.

Rehearse your message until your delivery matches the quality of your content.

Week-in and week-out, keep watching you and rehearsing. The biggest benefit will be invisible at first: you’ll be so comfortable with your message that you’ll be able to connect better with the teens in the room. You’ll be more personal. You’ll be more warm and responsive. You’ll be teaching them as their pastor, not lecturing them as their in-person Theology Wiki.

I HEAR YOU // The Practice of Listening in Youth Ministry

pensive ethnic man listening to answer in paper cup phone
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

As a general rule, youth pastors talk for a living (yes, even introvert youth pastors)… and if volunteer appreciation were a pay check, the same could be said for key volunteer youth workers and long-term small group leaders.

Whether it’s teaching the bible, praying at the end of a youth event, encouraging a parent or telling a great story to a group of junior highs, our roles revolve around communication and those of us who have been at it for a while have invested heavily in being better communicators. So the first time I realized that my listening, not my talking, was making the biggest impact on the students in my youth group I was shocked!

So the first time I realized that my listening, not my talking, was making the biggest impact on the students in my youth group I was shocked.

After all… I had been to *bible college*! I had such insightful things to share! How was it that listening well to students could have an even bigger impact than my best sermon? It would be years before I understood why, but I’m happy to share how the practice of listening in youth ministry made me a more effective pastor.

Why Listening Well is So Powerful

1. Listening models God’s character.
Have you ever noticed what a good listener God is? I mean, think about the last time you really prayed… you poured out your deepest feelings, your thoughts, and your questions to the God of the Universe and — he listened to you. Perhaps one of the deepest mysteries of prayer is the reality from Psalm 8:4:

What are mere mortals that you should think about them?
Human beings that you should care for them?


God, our Good Father, (who I’m sure has plenty of other very important things to do!) has time to listen to us. When we listen to our students well (not half-there or semi-attentive), we are pointing students to the One who does this best.

2. Listening tells the truth about identity.
One of the fundamental realities about the teen years is a deep wrestling with insecurities over identity and value. Their brains have developed rapidly in this time period, and with a newly developed capacity to actually consider what it means to be a fallen human being (one who is imperfect, wrestles with sin, makes mistakes, hurts others, and doesn’t flawlessly exist in this world) it’s no wonder that our students look in the mirror some days and wonder if they are “worth it” to anybody.

… it’s no wonder that our students look in the mirror some days and wonder if they are “worth it” to anybody.

While your words of affirmation are important, nothing speaks as loudly as your careful, thoughtful, uninterrupted listening presence in their lives. We may say that teenagers matter, but listening well proves we believe it.

We may say that teenagers matter, but listening well proves we believe it.

3. Listening creates an opportunity for meaningful processing.
As much as we all believe we know what we think, it’s usually not until we say it out loud, talk it out and have someone we actually trust hear what we’re saying that we really arrive anywhere. Listening well builds trust; with that trust and even more good listening we are able to give a unique gift to the students in our lives: a quiet place to process in a world of busyness and noise.

It’s not the lack of information that makes life complicated for today’s teens; it’s no place to “think” and reflect to develop the deep wisdom that makes our lives rich and meaningful. Listening well fights back against all of this.

How to Do it Better

I hope I’ve reminded you just how powerful great listening really is… So how do we do it really well?
Here’s a few things you can put into practice right away.

  • Get your phone out of sight, and don’t pick it up EVER during the conversation.
    (Stop making excuses, there are other ways of keeping an eye on the time!)
  • Stop interrupting. Don’t finish their sentences.
    (This is THE habit you need to break… it’s not helping you, it’s hurting your effectiveness.)
  • Let your eyes scream “delight“.
    (God delights in His children, and you have the privilege of sharing in that delight. Look at your students when they’re talking.)
  • Silence the conversation in your head.
    (It’s ok if you need a minute to think of what to say when they pause and ask what you think! Resist the temptation to be planning your response while they’re pouring out their heart.)
  • Be curious, not certain.
    (When you’re certain you’ve got the right answer, you’ll start giving advice. When you’re curious about what they’re thinking, what God’s saying and how they’re feeling, you’ll ask great questions.)
  • Say thank you.
    (Hearing someone’s heart is a tremendous privilege. Make sure they know that you feel that way! Always thank student’s for trusting you and sharing their life with you.)

God delights in His children, and you have the privilege of sharing in that delight. Look at your students when they’re talking.

The best part about improving your listening ministry is that it doesn’t matter what’s on your calendar this week, you’ll have an opportunity to practice it! And if this week is “talk-heavy” for you (preaching, teaching, small-group, etc.) I’m praying that this will be a useful touch point for you as you look for the key moments to hear what the students in your ministry are saying.